On Thanksgiving we all give thanks for the wonderful things in our lives. Here are some things I am thankful for:
10. That guy who explained to me what a 'hemi' was so now I understand truck commercials a little better. Before, I thought it was a man dressed as a woman.
9. That I have not seen a new Ryan Phillippe film in 4 years.
8. That as a man, I can eat a Yorkie.
7. Lucy the Elephant, even though she can't eat a Yorkie.
6. I am thankful the show The O.C. is about 'Orange County', California not 'octopus candy.'
5. That despite the fact that I have said "Kool Aid" many times, the Kool Aid Man hasn't broken down any walls in my house.
4. The Real Gilligan's Island, only because it puts us closer to The Real ALF.
3. Mountain Dew Code Red. It's like drinking a horrible emergency.
2. Planetariums, it's like being outside without all that having to go outside stuff.
1.Scooter the talking baseball from the 2004 World Series. He taught us all we know about baseball.
What a great list! I am going to read this at my house at Thanksgiving!
ReplyDeleteThanks Guy!
I too, do not miss Ryan Phillippe! Too bad you brought him up!
ReplyDeleteYikes! And I thought I had a lot to be thankful for!
ReplyDeleteGood bless us, everyone. Now pass the Mountain Dew!
ReplyDelete-KATZ
Dude, I used to want a Hemi. Now, I am not so sure!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteI'm thankful that even Ryan Phillippe hasn't figured out that he's gay. Now I must go finish Jay Leno's dry cleaning.
ReplyDeleteThanksgiving?? More like ThanksOSCAR!! Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade?? More like Macy's Thanksgiving Day OSCAR!! I am also thankful for the bounty of great movies we out in theaters today.
ReplyDeleteThe Polar Express...More like OSCAR Express
SpongeBob Sqaure Pants....More like SpongeBob OSCAR Pants
Alfie.....More like OSCAR
Christmas with the Kranks....More like Christmas with OSCAR
Ray....More like OSCAR
Bridget Jones's Diary....More Like Bridget Jones's OSCAR
Kinsey...More like OSCAR
Oh wait!! Oh wait I just used that one with Alife and Ray. Hmmm.... I'm also thankful that movies with single name titles are issued so infrequently.
I am thankful that God made pudding much easier to open.
ReplyDeleteAnd also, I'm a complete idiot.
Today's Obvious Joke of the Day:
ReplyDeleteMy turkey got arrested last thanksgiving because of fowl play!!
Today's Obvious Joke of the Day is sponsored by the Indiana Pacers. The Pacers, if we can't beat them, we'll BEAT them. And CBS News. Tonight on CBS News, 8 real news stories and 1 phony. Which one's the fake? You might be suprised. Tonight, only on the CBS News.
How original. A list of things you are thankful the day before Thanksgiving. You must be named O. Riginality to come up with something like that. I think you should change this site's name to O. Riginality's Site of Things Never Done Before Thanksgiving". And most of the things you are thankful seem to link to previous articles. I'm sure you are truly thankful for these items and not trying to self-promote your site to the same 5 people who read it every day anyway.
ReplyDeleteOh, and Gene Shalit inserted the word "Oscar" into a movie title. No one's ever done that before, either. Because making fun of Gene Shalit is so cutting edge. Wow, that poster doesn't care who's toes he steps on. Hopefully tomorrow, he can really stick to that "Dude, you're getting a Dell guy." I know that would fix his wagon.
I'm so glad I read about your thankfulness. It really sheds new light on stuff you've never mentioned before. It's like I'm looking at O. Riginality's soul through a whole new window.
WHY MENTION THIS STUFF ONLY ON THANKSGIVING???? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU SWEETIE?? WHY CAN'T YOU BE THANKFUL FOR THIS STUFF ALL YEAR 'ROUND?? WHY ONLY MENTION IT NOW?? WHY NOT SHOW APPRECIATION FOR MOUNTAIN DEW CODE RED BY WRITING A LETTER TO THE MOUNTIAIN DEW PEOPLE EVERY DAY??? WHY NOT CALL RYAN PHILLIPE AND TELL HIM YOU THANKFUL THAT HE STAYS HOME AND WON'T MAKE MORE MOVIES?? I THINK ONLY REMEMBERING WHAT YOU ARE THANKFUL FOR NOW IS JUST UNAMERICAN!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI NEED TO TAKE A BRAKE FROM SHOUTING!!! WHEN I RETURN I WILL YELL AT J.C. WATTS AND RON REAGAN JR. ABOUT NOT PUTTING ENOUGH STUFFING AND GRAVY AT THE THANKSGIVING TABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Kingdom of Burgers has much to celebrate this year, even though Thanksgiving is an American Holiday. I shall decree that today will be a day of Thanksgiving throughout the Kingdom of Burgers. The citizens will give thanks for the following items:
ReplyDelete1) No one has called me on the grammatical mistake of naming a burger Whooper Jr.
2)Unlike the rampant crime in McDonaldland, we executed our Burger thieves years ago.
3)No one has discovered that the BK Kids Clubs is actually just a support group for Neverland Ranch survivors.
4)The lineage of the Burger family will rule into the next century.
ALL HAIL THE KINDOM OF BURGERS!!
Great movie idea: There are a ton of Christmas movies, but no Thanksgiving movies. Check this major film idea out:
ReplyDeleteA family thinks it's thanksgiving and the father hunts the Turkey, the mom stays home all day and cooks gravy and stuffing. The kids run downstairs to watch the parade. They are waiting. All of a sudden the kids see George Washington on the TV Screen. They are confused. Then Taft is on the screen. They wonder what kind of sick twisted parade is this? Then Benjamin Harrison. Even the parents grow concerned.
In an shocking surprise twist, the family learns that the day is actually President's Day, not Thanksgiving and instead of a parade, they are watching a mattress sale commercial.
Great huh? What? No? It looks like another night of helping Pat Morita with Jay Leno's dry cleaning.
I am thankful for delicious hamburgers, hamburger patties, cows, hamburger buns, relish, tomato, lettuce. I am thankful that I finally got some props in the prison yard, even if it required sticking a shiv in Ambrose "The Mudman" during the exercise room. I am thankful for not being attacked in the prison shower. But first, and foremost I am incredibly thankful for Robble Robble. I think we need to remember tomorrow that we should sit down and thank our creator for Robble Robble. I know I will.
ReplyDeleteI am thanful that I had an opportunity to challenge Buttercup for the Kangaroo Boxing championship belt. That was one tough Kangaroo. I am thankful that my friend Dan was finally elected into the Kangaroo Boxing Hall of Fame this year. I am also thankful that most Kangaroos are still more intelligent fighters than Ron Artest.
ReplyDeleteI am thankful for all the fine ladies with all the junk in their trunks. I am also thankful that Kobe is still stuck on the sinking ship that used to be the Lakers.
ReplyDeleteI am thankful that my not guilty ass got to spend the summer drinking margaritas on the beach. I am thankful to Ron Artest, who now makes me the least hated player in the NBA. Did you see all that punching, kicking, and assualt? I thought I was watching video from my last date.
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, I'm also thankful to my wife for standing by me during this difficult time. Good thing I remembered or I would have owed her another $4,000 ring.
I am thankful that I can convince both nearsighted and drunk women that I am Jude Law.
ReplyDeleteI am thankful for Hilary Duff's new CD, the Lizzie McGuire DVD release, Cindarella Story, Raise Your Voice, Napoleon Dynamite (3 Duff movies in 1 year!! Will '05 feature 6?) and that judges are still too lazy to enforce restraining orders!
ReplyDeleteI am thankful that nations are slowly starting to rise up and say, "ENOUGH DUFF!!" You saw it in the recent election, where most voters polled said, "Duff Increase" was the number one problem facing America. You see it in Afghanistan and Iraq, which President Bush promises to be Duff free by January 30. You see it in the fact that 6 of the 527 groups were only focused on anti-Duff legislation. I am thankful that the UN will seriously look at Duff proliferation by 2006. The world is changing. Freedom is on the march and Duff Proliferation is under it's boot.
ReplyDeleteI am thankful that I am able to listen to Hilary Duff's CD, see Raise Your Voice, Cindarella Story, and Napoleon Dynamite as well as watch Lizzie McGuire Season 1. Yet, I am also thankful that I was able to balance it by listening to a U2 CD, seeing movies like Miracle, and Mr. 3000 and other non-Duff related entertainment. This enabled me to finally achieve the proper balance between Duff and non-Duff in my life. I believe that reaching this balance has lead to a healthier lifestyle and a better piece of mind. I hope more people decide to walk the Duff/Non-Duff line and enjoy a proper balance.
ReplyDeleteGene Hackman is so cool that plentiful bounty is thankful for him.
ReplyDeleteYou know what would be AWESOME?? If Evel Knievel jumped over the Mayflower the moment it landed at Plymouth Rock. But because motorcycles had not been invented yet, he tried to use one of those old-timey 1920s bicycles. But that wasn't invited yet, either. So he used a horse. And the Native Americans were so impressed by this feat, they welcomed the new visitors their land. As the Indians and Pilgrims set the table and bowed thier head in a thanksgiving prayer, Evel Knievel jumped over the table and swiped the Mountain Dew Code Red on everyone's table and chugged it all in one gulp. Oh man that would be SSSWWWWWWEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am thankful for the all the free time I have at work.
ReplyDeleteThat picture is the funniest thing I have ever seen! EVER!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am thankful for pizza. Lots of Pizza!
ReplyDeleteBig Ern
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