Friday, March 17, 2006

MC Hammer is 2 Legit 2 Quit

MC Hammer's 2 Legit 2 Quit

I should have done a song review last year. There are so many great songs with the number "one" in them.

"One is the Loneliest Number" would have been fantastic to analyze.

Instead, for the two year anniversary I looked for songs with "2" in the title. The best I found was MC Hammer.

I don't even understand what the title means. If "legit" is short for "legitimate" than what was he so legitimate at that he couldn't quit? Maybe we'll find out. But, I doubt it.

MC Hammer: 2 Legit 2 Quit

Too legit... Too legit to quit (three times)
Sweat running all over my chest (chest) i don't quit no!

Ick. Thanks for that visual image. A sweaty chested man with giant pants. Perhaps he is too legitimately gross to quick making me ill.

I just press harder (Yea!) than i ever did before going for
The dreams that i have in store in my mind (mind) and i know
That I'm makin it i gotta get mine and nobody's takin it away

What? He thinks that we are trying to take something from him and that the only way for him to keep "it" is to work so hard his chest starts to sweat?

(No!) cause hammer don't play that you try to get mine
boy you better step back freeze (freeze) cause
You don't want none i hustle for my muscle and you look
Weak son (real weak) yea!... I'm goin for all that i can get

Hammer ain't weak. His anti-perspirant is, but not Hammer.

Kickin at the top cause I'm too legit to quit...sing!...

Too legit... Too legit to quit (hey...hey...) Too legit...too
legit... Too legit to quit...(hey...) Too legit... Too legit to quit
(too legit...) too legit... too legit to quit...

when i feel high post don't you play me close a dig 'em smack

Hey! He quoted a cereal mascot! Wow! I hope he speaks of the Soggies attempts to annex Cap'n Crunch's prized vessel.

a get you back and I'll hit with a dose of Oaktown power
and charge you by the hour I'm shakin like a quake and funks
get devoured i choose to abuse, misuse and confuse
competitors who think they're makin up all the rules, fools
in the game lame and insane it's a shame i gotta do this but
i remain the same unchanged gettin better never known

Read any part of the lyrics to this song, then listen to a hobo swearing on a street corner. I defy you to tell me the difference!

as a sweater kickin it at the top cause i got myself together
so roll with a guy who's physical and fit knows the time
and too legit to quit...sang!

A sweater kicked him? Maybe I read that wrong. Still, perhaps the sweater is to blame for the perspiration on his chest.

Repeat chorus x2

step to the rhythm of a sho-nuff winner (winner) i been
here before (yo!) i ain't no beginner (word) but i been new
tried and true survival of the fittest yo! brought me through
my crew (talk) we're ready to strike trained for the mission
so believe the hype and sweat it (sweat it) cause you're gonna

Sweat it? I know it seems like I am OBSESSED with his sweat, but remember HE brought it up! The man was sweating to hip hop and wanted you to do the same.

MC Hammer is the Richard Simmons of Rap.

regret it the day that you dissed us you'll wish you never met us
you remind me of a real short story one hit record and you
star to bore me get ready cause this is it your crew is
through and we too legit to quit...sang!...


Too legit... Too legit to quit...Too legit... Too legit to quit
Too legit... Too legit to quit...Too legit... Too legit to quit
get buck...get buck...get buck...get buck...get buck...(many times)

my people we don't know defeat we crush the strong and
percolate the weak daily (everyday) we make our moves to

Percolate the weak? Percolate means "To cause liquid to pass through a porous substance or small holes."

I bet he's saying he makes the weak sweat. Sweat to the oldies.

improve our groove because we love to rule where we
lay yo!..(Yo!) work and play we started at the bottom and
now we're leading the way and yea!..(yea!) I'm havin a fit kickin it
at the top because I'm too legit to quit...sang!...


hey...hey...hey...hey... too legit to quit.. too legit to quit..
we're rolling on...we're rolling on...we're rolling on...we're rolling on...
he's on top...he's on top...he's on top...he's on top...
goin to burn it up...goin to burn it up...goin to burn it up...
goin to burn it up...
too legit to quit...too legit to quit
we're rollin on..hey..hey..hey...too legit.

chorus to fade

So, in conclusion: MC Hammer was so legitimate that he couldn't quit. He's still being legitimate somewhere.

We just stopped paying attention to him.