The other day as I surfed through the Internets I came across a page for a tourist attraction called Presidents Park.
I have no idea how I lived this long without Presidents Park.
Take a look:
This place is the perfect combo of my two favorite things: Presidents and large things I can stand in front of for photographs.
If they threw in free tacos and put on a Weird Al CD I would have never left.
Presidents Park is in Williamsburg Virginia and is right off a busy road. Drive by and you can miss the heads of FDR and Calvin Coolidge buried up to their necks, just like Clint Eastwood in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. It was so eerily similar I expected Eli Wallach and Lee Van Cleef to arrive and I could finally determine who was ugly.
Then I would have Lee give me a piggy back ride through the park as Eli tells me knock knock jokes.
And free tacos and Weird Al music.
Anyway, you enter the park through a beautiful building which also had some neat exhibits.
A video on Obama played in the lobby, replicas of famous First Lady dresses were on display and they had pieces of Chester A. Arthur's beard. Not his real beard, the beard of his giant head.
Apparently a recent storm had given him a "shave."
Excuse me... I have to go laugh until I pass out.
Ahhh. Where was I? Oh yeah, the beard.
Also in the lobby they have photos of all the first ladies and a 2000 "butterfly ballot" machine. I used it to work my abs and delts. It was a rad workout, bro.
After you check out the lobby and gift shop you can start your journey through the fun, non-partisan world of giant President heads.
The heads line a winding path in chronological order. Each one is accompanied by a few signs with details on the Commander in Chief. Everything from standard information about when they took office to the silly trivia stuff that I really like.
They are each the same height (about 20 feet tall) which is really impressive, but it means I couldn't kiss them all on their luscious stone lips (I am looking at you, Franklin Peirce!)