Tuesday, July 20, 2004

Three Men and a Baby Genius (minus the three men and with a few more babies)

I saw a preview for Baby Geniuses 2: Return of the Super Babies.

let me repeat that:

Baby Geniuses 2: Return of the Super Babies

What a wonderful time we live in! It makes me cry, thinking about previous generations and the hardships they faced, with NO Baby Geniuses 2: Return of the Super Babies!

For those of you who don't remember Baby Geniuses, let me assure you it was a real movie.

In years past, a comedy producer may have invented a title like this as a satire. Leonard Part 6 for example.

Bill Cosby made this film back in the late 1980s when nobody ever told him "no" about ANYTHING.

For an example: see his Cosby Show sweaters.

In Leonard Part 6 we are told that Leonard's previous adventures (1-5) were confiscated by the government. The film follows the basic 'spy film' plot. Secret agent is after dad guys, bad guys are after a secret agent, secret agent rides on an ostrich.

It will be interesting to see the Ostrich scene in Baby Geniuses 2: Return of the Super Babies.

Baby Geniuses was made by Bob Clark, a director with the GREATEST FILMOGRAPHY EVER. Let us take a look:

Karate Dog, The (2004)
KARATE DOG! Those two words could not seem MORE awesome when placed SIDE-BY-SIDE! Like a live action Hong Kong Phooey! A dog that does Karate! I am not going to miss that!

Maniac Magee (2003)
In a world full of Maniacs, Magee stands out. Magee formerly a name used only when referring to dumb puppets, now can add MANIAC to it's resume!

Baby Geniuses (1999)
The original. Hard to believe it has been 5 YEARS! I guess they were waiting until the statute of limitations ran out on those 'child labor violations.'

Fudge-A-Mania (1995)
Better not let Maniac Magee near the fudge! This could be a disaster!

From the Hip (1987)
Judd Nelson plays an attorney named Stormy Weathers. He later played a weatherman named Legal Jurisprudence.

Rhinestone (1984)
Dolly Parton and Sylvester Stallone! I once watched this BACK-TO-BACK with the Jane Mansfield Story featuring Loni Anderson and Arnold Schwarzenegger. I am still blind in my left eye because of that night.

Christmas Story, A (1983)
Yup, he did this too.

Porky's II: The Next Day (1983)
Glad to see he is staying true to his bad sequel roots.

Porky's (1982)
Wow, Porky's had a DIRECTOR!

Black Christmas (1974)
The best Christmas murder film EVER.

Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (1972)
See, he was all about the kids, even then.

She-Man (1967)
Never saw this film, Clark's debut. I think it's about He-Man's OTHER sister. The one even She-Ra wants nothing to do with.

Yes, Bob Clark is a renaissance man. Long live Baby Geniuses 2: Return of the Super Babies!

Related junk: Back to the Future, Movie Remakes & Cakes, and He-Man RULES!


  1. You know what would be AWESOME? If instead of babies, "Baby Geniuses" was about Evel Knievel and instead of being a genius, he jumped over things. Man, he could jump over that dude's grandmother, people named Jr., the T-Rex from Jurassic Park, A hobo, Count Von Count, a prisoner holding bars all day, a taco, a robot, Bob McGrath, Hillary Duff, A DVD copy of Joe Somebody, A hobo, Mr. Freeze, a goat eating a can, Mr. T, a tycoon lighting a cigar with a $100 bill, a smoking monkey, Frasier and Lillith, The Riddler, A poor person wearing a barrell, a Waffle House, A Taco Bell, a McDonalds, Cookie Monster, and a dude with a beard of bees. Oh man, that would be SWWWWWEEEEEEEETTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!

  2. Evel,

    Your post reads like something some idiot would write while signing a year book. You are a moron.

  3. Freeze,

    You know what would be AWESOME?? If Evel Knievel never jumps over you. Then you would be sorry. Oh man, that would be SWWWWWWEEEEEEETTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!

  4. Freeze and Evel!
    Settle down both of you! We only have room for two feuds on this site: Avril vs Hilarys (Duff & Clinton) and Anton and everyone.

  5. To steal a line from Evel, This is going to be SWEET!!

    I have been attending "Baby Geniuses" conventions for the past 4 years and the buzz on this film is just incredible. "Geniuses" (as we like to call ourselves) say this might be the best film of the triology. Although Bob Clark won't release plans for the 3rd movie yet. I know he's slaving away on a great script at the Baby Geniuses Ranch in Northern California.

    I plan on dressing like Dr. Heep and sleeping outside my movie theater all week if I have to. My girlfrend is going dress like Elena Kinder. We may dress our dog as Lenny (Dom DeLouise to you "non-geniuses")Someday I'll be able to tell my kids "I was there."

    Now I was a little disappointed because at first I thought only the two droids would be returning, but it looks like they are not even returning. However, I welcome what Jon Voight and Vanessa Angel can add to the rich "Baby Geniuses" tapestry. What stories can they tell? Wait and see my friend, wait and see.

    Now my friends keep telling me, "Don't get your hopes up. You could be disappointed." They remind me how excited I was about "Bobby Jones: Stroke of Genius". They say, "That was genius film. You hated it." Well that may be true, remember this: Bobby Jones may have been a genius, but he was NOT (and this important) a baby. So those naysayers can stick their head in the sand. I march fully confident towards "Baby Geniuses 2" knowing full well it's the "I Have A Dream" speech for my generation.

  6. Freeze, you are so wise in the ways of the Baby Geniuses. I attended one convention, but left to follow the Baby's Day Out convention circuit.