Peanuts.
Jimmy Carter's favorite snack.
Once, they were a staple on airplanes.
Some people are allergic to them.
There is a puppet named Peanut. He is a woozle.
Peanuts.
That is what Charles Schultz named this comic strip. Kids. A strip about kids. Not about Peanuts.
None of the children are named Peanut. As far as I know they don't live in a town named Peanut. I don't even think they ever EAT peanuts in the strip.
But Schultz choose to name the strip Peanuts.
SCHULTZ: What should I name this comic strip? Peanuts or Legumes?
HAL KETCHUM: I thought a peanut was a legume.
SCHULTZ: No, a legume is a fruit.
HAL KETCHUM: You're a fruit.
SCHULTZ: You wanna piece of me, Ketchum?
HAL KETCHUM: Go for it, Schultz.
SCHULTZ: Oh, I'm going for it. It's Schultz time!
So, he named the strip Peanuts and Hal Ketchum had to draw Dennis The Menace with the other hand for a few weeks. But the name is still stupid.
People like to say that they work for peanuts; and they go BANANAS.
I am convinced that banana is the third funniest word in the English language right behind 'jiggle' and 'formaldehyde.'
Yes, banana is comedy. This is why bananas is so often used in movie titles:
Herbie Goes Bananas
Going Bananas
Bananas
I'm sure there are others, but I don't have the energy to look them up.
Simply inserting the word banana into a sentence makes it funny.
For example:
"Death"
DOCTOR: I have to tell you, Stella is DEAD!
or
DOCTOR: I have to tell you, Stella is BANANAS!
See, how bananas make everything funnier?
Like, remember the beginning of this junk when NOTHING was funny? Lets add some bananas!
----------------------
Peanuts.
Jimmy Carter's favorite snack.
Once, they were a staple on airplanes.
Some people are allergic to them.
There is a puppet named Peanut. He is a banana.
----------------------
Uh, I guess there are some things even bananas can't help.
Baloney! Another word people use out of context every day.
Baloney is also like ketchup a victim of 'Double spelling food syndrome.' Bologna? How is that possibly pronounced Baloney? HOW? And 'catsup'? I am convinced that the 'catsup' spelling only existed so we would laugh when Jerry would get Tom's head stuck in a bottle of 'catsup.'
Baloney can also mean 'lies' or 'ridiculous'.
POLITICIAN: Your policies are full of BALONEY!
OTHER POLITICIAN: Your policies are abosolutly BANANAS!
POLITICIAN: Your favorite snack is PEANUTS!
I always thought Peanuts was a weird name. I always called it 'Charlie Brown'.
ReplyDeleteYou know what would be AWESOME?? To take a bunch of peanuts and bananas and spread them out as far as the eye can see across Georgia and then have Evel Knievel jump over the peanuts and bananas. It would be billed as a television special, "Knievel Goes Bananas". Could you imagine if Knievel jumped the peanuts and bananas by riding Herbie instead of his trademark motocycle??? AND Dean Jones was NEXT TO EVEL KNIEVEL????? Oh man, that would be SWEET!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteLet me try:
ReplyDeleteThis article sucked.
or
This article was bananas!
Yeah, that does sound better.
(kidding, it was very funny.)
the lunch lady at my school used to SAY catsup. other than that i have never heard it.
ReplyDeleteTaco Kid, you must be lying. No one says catsup and no one remembers their lunch lady. It is a proven fact.
ReplyDeletei tell you no lies. she said catsup. she also said a-boot instead of about. she looked like marge simpson with shorter hair.
ReplyDeleteI must say I miss the peanuts on airplanes. They were much better than the little pretzel bags.
ReplyDeleteGreat! We needed more Jimmy Carter on this site.
ReplyDeleteI am alergic to peanuts!
ReplyDelete