Tuesday, March 15, 2005

H and Some

Once again I went to the dollar store and found ANOTHER great superhero.

Handsome Appearance.

HANDSOME APPEARANCE!!!!

That has to be the coolest name ever for a robot toy. Strange, but super cool!

My guess is that the makers of the fine toy, Star Brite of China, didn't realize that HANDSOME is one word so they spelled it as three separate words. They even put them in different colors.

Now, you might notice a similarity between Handsome and The Transformers. He looks a little like Optimus Prime. One big difference, Handsome doesn't transform.

But to be honest, why mess with perfection? If you looked this good why would you want to change?

Actually, now that I think of it, WHY did ANY of The Transformers ever change?
They are always changing into some mundane piece of electronics that pales when compared to their regular shape. Let’s take a look at some of their shape-shifting choices:

A car or A BIG ROBOT

A dump truck or A BIG ROBOT

A cassette player or A BIG FRIGGIN ROBOT

I choose BIG FRIGGIN ROBOT!

Handsome does have a neat little feature, his chest lights up. A little LED light, activated by a button on his back.

Also Handsome has a number 8 on his chest. This is because of his endless devotion to Dale Ernhardt Jr.

On the right hand side of the package is drawing of Handsome holding his shield and sword. For some reason he is depicted in all silver, rather than the red, white and yellow that he actually wears.

What I find more interesting than his color scheme is the fact that he carries a sword and a shield. HE'S A FUTURISTIC ROBOT! He carries weapons like he's an extra in a bad gladiator film. He has a missile strapped to his side, but he chooses to use the weapons from the days of yore.

The final mark of a TRUE dollar store hero is the "copyright infringement". It seems at first glance that there is NONE one Handsome. But a close look at his shield reveals...

...part of the logo of the Bruce Willis film, The Fifth Element. Way to represent, Handsome.

Still, he may wear the "Fifth" on his shield, but he wears the "8" on his heart.

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