Friday, August 06, 2004

Antz iz one of ze weirdest filmz ever

This is about the movie Antz. Phil Collins is not in this film, nor did he do any music for this film. However, I will guarantee 1 Phil Collins' reference before it is over!

In 1998 Dreamworks released Antz. This HAS to be one of the strangest films ever made! Most adults dismiss this film as a kiddie flick, but it is far from that.

Antz had a successful run at the box office. It spent two weeks at number one and raked in over 90 million dollars! Unfortunately, Antz success was over shadowed by the success of A Bug's Life just one month later. A Bugs Life ended up making over 160 Million.

Still, have you noticed that A Bugs Life is the black sheep of the Pixar community? They mention EVERY other film they made in the ad campaign for The Incredibles:
NARRATOR: From Pixar, the makers of Toy Story, Monsters Inc. and Finding Nemo. They have also made the commercials for Toy Story, Monsters Inc. and Finding Nemo! They also made several short films including Knick Knack and Geri's Game. Plus, when they were just starting out they made a commercial for a car wash in Pittsburgh. Also they have made over 50 home movies including John Lasseter's Family Picnic and Shelly's 10th Birthday! Now they present The Incredibles!

Jeez! It must be tough for Antz to be in THAT shadow!

Well, here's the story:

Woody Allen is an ant.

Let me repeat that:


This is the coolest film EVER! Woody plays Z. Man, they were really pushing this whole 'letter Z' thing. Seriously, would Ants have been a bad title? Does a Z make things sound more whimsical? I bet some moviegoers went to the film thinking it was a hip hop film like Boyz In The Hood or Biker Boyz or 8 Milez or Mrz. Doubtfirez. The Z does sound hip.

So, Z is depressed until one day he meets the Princess (voiced by Sharon Stone) and convinces his buddy (Sylvester Stallone) to switch jobs with him.
Z is a worker ant, but Stallone is a soldier ant. Now they switch. Stallone takes to the worker ant job very well. He starts digging tunnels and soon he is dating J-Lo (OK, it's a cartoon ant VOICED by J-Lo, but doesn't EVERYONE in Hollywood get to date J-lo? I bet it's Stallone's turn.)

Z on the other hand fares poorly. Z is a horrible soldier. General Mandible (Gene Hackman) sends Z into battle where he meets Barbatus (Danny Glover). After a fierce battle with the termites, Z's entire platoon is dead. Danny Glover is decapitated, but Z comes home a hero.

However, Z goes on the run with the Princess. Gene Hackman sends Christopher Walken after them.

I don't want to spoil the ending, but this film is BIZARRE. The ants meet 2 wasps who are W.A.S.P.s, they get stuck to a shoe, they see amazing Pepsi product placement and Z comes face to face with Abe Lincoln! To top things off the word 'hell' and 'damn' are tossed around as casually as hair tonic at Phil Collins house!

See! I keep my promises!

Have you seen Antz?


  1. I have not seen Antz. Is this anything like the film Beez? I have seen that, I even got to meet some of the stars. Two of them live in my BEARD OF BEES.

  2. inever saw Antz, but i will have to now! by the way, i loved the phil collins reference.

  3. You know what would be AWESOME?? If an animated Evel Knievel jumped over the ants. Oh man that would be SWWWWEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!

  4. Gene Hackman is so cool that Antz step on him!

  5. Yes, Evel. That would be sweet. But not as cool as if an animated Super Dave tried to jump it and failed. Then Evel jumped over both of them with Phil Collins riding in a sidecar.

  6. I prefered Pixar's other great animated "Z" film, Vivan Vantz. It was fun to see Ethel recreated through the magic of animation. The animated William Frawley was also cool. However, I still think the Will Smith classic, "The Legend of Vivian Vance" was the best film made about her career.

  7. I saw ANTZ when it came out. It was not very memorable. Phil Collinz on the other hand iz. Most of Pixar and Disney films are geared just as much,if not more, for adultz than kidz.