Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Thanksgiving on eBay

Ah, Thanksgiving, the time of year where we eat turkey and pretend to enjoy the company of our families.
Yes, it is a special time. There is much to celebrate and give thanks for.

We can give thanks for our health, the people we love and our great country. But, most of all, we can give thanks for eBay.

Yes, the internet auction site that is there to fulfill every dream you have. Like a genie in a magic bottle, except it can only give you other people's old junk and you have to pay shipping.
Today, let us see what Thanksgiving items are currently on eBay. I know what you are thinking: Hey! I will never get this junk by tomorrow! With the post office closed the best I can hope for is maybe I will get it by NEXT Wednesday! That is pretty stupid to sell your Thanksgiving stuff on eBay this early.

Well, to answer your question, that is not a question. Plus, I have no idea why people put their items on so late. Maybe they want to use them for one final year and THEN ship them out. Either way, here is some of the best Thanksgiving stuff on eBay:

The Forever Friends Thanksgiving coloring book and more: Yes, this brings back memories. The 'Forever Friends' with Montgomery Moose and that silly frog! Or, maybe that was the 'Get Along Gang.' Either way, for just $3.99 you can learn all about the Forever Friends! Maybe you find out the deep dark secret held by the raccoon with the checkered vest!
The title of the auction announces that it is for the coloring book 'and more', but the description doesn't tell you what 'more' they give.
The description does say that '2 pages are loose and pages have discolored.' Ugh! Maybe 'more' is what caused the discoloration. You don't want to know WHAT it is, but you will get it!

1908 Buffalo NY. Cancel Thanksgiving day postcard: Not nearly as humorous as it sounds. I pictured a humorous cartoon of a Buffalo standing in Time Square holding a sign reading 'Cancel Thanksgiving Day.' Then, underneath the cartoon a caption would read '23 Skidoo, Dewey Beats Truman, Again!'
Of course, the caption wouldn't make any sense to us because we weren’t alive in 1908. Comedy was much different then.

Yeah, that would be cool. Instead it is a rather tasteful Thanksgiving post card picturing a formal turkey dinner.

Boys' Life November 1966 Thanksgiving Edition!: For the bargain price of $1.99 you can get this gem! A copy of the Boy Scouts of America's official magazine. This cover shows a priceless photo of a boy and his dead turkey.

Sadly, this never became an NBC sitcom.

Featured articles include: The microworld, Floyd Little-Football's Mr Big, Stone Age Marathon Runners and Stalking Deer West of the Pecos.

I didn't make up those titles, but they sound COMPLETLY phony!

Let me try:
Featured articles include: Ice Station Jelly Pants, Matilda's Tiny Yard Stick hose, Astronaut mannequins and beat the FBI's kids at yogurt.
Yeah, that makes JUST as much sense.

And, finally there is the Fall/Thanksgiving Smock NWT/L: Fall/Thanksgiving! Here is someone that is late TWICE in the same title. Too late for Thanksgiving and too late for fall.

Oh well, I can't complain because I love SMOCKS. It just sounds like a dirty word. Take a look:

"After class, the art teacher made me return the smock she gave me."
"Nice smock."
"You'll need a smock if you want to stay dry!"
"I am going to wear Andy Rooney's smock."

Yes, I love a good smock. This is a grey one featuring an embroidered cornucopia. The description of the item goes into tremendous detail about the contents of the cornucopia. Most interestingly the description features the words 'VERY SEXY' in all capital letters.

Yes, sometimes the smock gets the best of us.


  1. A coloring book that's discolored?? Talk about irony!!

  2. Gene Hackman is so cool smocks wear him!

  3. What the Hell is This....Thanksgiving should be devoted to that crap music group Run-DMC....they were a bunch of no talent Turkeys!!! How any idiot could have listened to that junk, makes me shake my head... and realize what PT Barnum said many years ago!!! "There's a Sucker born every minute"!

  4. Anonymous11/24/2004

    I love the stuff about the Buffalo!

  5. Yeah, I always thought BOYS LIFE was really a right wing wacko mag!