Mmmmmm mmm. Nothing says tasty like a good ol' hot dog. Or that old British lady at the bank. She says tasty 'tass tee.' I am not sure why I know that.
Still, old ladies aside, I love a hot dog.
In a quest to find THE GREATEST HOT DOG in Hollywood I visited three of the most famous hot dog eateries in the world. I ate three hot dogs full of sodium, nitrates and parts of over 25 different animals. Needless to say it was the greatest lunch of my life!!!
Pink's is often used as an establishing shot in movies set in Hollywood such as Volcano and Golden Child.
Founded by Paul Pink in 1939 the hot spot is famous for their chili dogs. I decided, however, that to keep this as fair a comparison as possible I would try all the hot dogs plain. No chili, no mustard, no ketchup, no marshmallow fluff, no essence of Emril, no heaven, no hell below us, nothing to kill or die for, no religion, no possessions, no need for greed or hunger- I’m sorry at moments this negative I have a tendency to turn into John Lennon.
So I asked for one plain Pink's hot dog and in less than 30 seconds I was sitting under an autographed photo of Bill Cosby and eating a hot dog.
The walls of Pink's are COVERED with photos of hot dog eating celebrities. Everyone from Rosie O'Donnell to Jay Leno has signed a photo for their walls.
Before I left I bought a Pink's T-shirt. The black shirt features their famous logo on the front and the quote "A Hollywood Legend since 1939."
Pink's is located on La Brea drive near Melrose. It is about 2 minutes south of Hollywood Blvd.
CONCLUSION: AWESOME! A great hot dog, with one of the best tasting hot dog buns I ever had.
After Pink's I headed to Hollywood Blvd. for Skooby's. Skooby's is right on the Walk of Fame and very close to Fredericks' Of Hollywood.
I ordered a hot dog and a glass of fresh lemonade. The lemonade was so good I briefly contemplating just looking for places with good lemonade and skipping the whole 'hot dog' thing.
But then, I tried the hot dog. They cooked slower than at Pink's, but it was worth it.
This was a fantastic hot dog! Hot off the grill, covered in grease it was one of the greatest things I have ever put in my mouth -and that includes the time I bit one of Robert Plant's guitars at the Hard Rock Hotel in Orlando. (I would like to tell you more, but I have been advised not to, as the case is still pending.)
I also picked up a shirt. This one is red featuring the 'Eat Skooby's Hot Dogs Hollywood' logo.
CONCLUSION: Maybe it was because I was soooo jazzed about the lemonade, maybe it was because the girl working the grill was cute, or maybe it was just because the word 'Skooby' brings to mind images of the Mystery Machine and Casey Kassem, but regardless, this was the greatest hot dog I have ever had.
I decided to finish my hot dog eating journey with a very famous hot dog, the stadium treat, THE Dodger Dog.
Since Dodger Stadium is located about 20 minutes outside of Hollywood, I headed to the only place in Hollywood where I can buy a Dodger Dogs all year round.
Universal Studios, home of Jurassic Park, King Kong and Jaws also has a Dodger Dog stand. With the familiar Dodger's logo on the marquee, the stand sells hot dogs that are identical to the ones sold behind home plate.
Of course, being at a theme park, this was the most expensive hot dog I ate that day.
The stand was right outside Back to the Future the Ride so after my three hot dog lunch I traveled across time in search of Biff and a stolen time machine.
The best news was I didn't lose my lunch.
All in all, the Dodger's stand was nice and convenient. The hot dog was big and served fast.
They didn't sell T-shirts at the stand, but I was able to visit a huge Dodger's MLB store in nearby Universal Studio's City Walk.
CONCLUSION: Another great hot dog.
I love hot dogs and I love Hollywood. Finally, I can love them both at once.
Still, I don't get the joke about the British lady at the bank. Also, what was the deal with that Robert Plant story? Does that even count as a joke?
FINAL CONCLUSION: I wish I had called this 'Weiner's of Hollywood.' That would have been funnier. I also think the review of Skooby's was a bit short.
Plus, why didn't I take a photo of the stand at Universal Studios? THAT was a glaring error.
FINAL GRADE: B (I have written worse)