Thursday, August 09, 2007

James Monroe: The Last Cocked Hat

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Born in Virginia, in 1758, Monroe attended the College of William and Mary. He roomed with William and briefly dated Mary.

During his political career he joined the anti-Federalists in the Virginia Convention which ratified the Constitution, as elected United States Senator, served as Minister to France in 1794-1796 and helped negotiate the Louisiana Purchase.

His ambition and energy, together with the backing of President James Madison, he won the Presidency in 1816 and easily won re-election in 1820.

Early in his administration, Monroe went on a "Goodwill" tour. He played six sold out shows at Madison Square Garden before the tour moved to Boston. In Boston, his visit kicked off an "Era of Good Feelings." To demonstrate Monroe slid his hand into his trousers and was promptly thrown in the brig, ending the tour.

Meanwhile, a painful economic depression was seriously harshing the mellow of the people of the Missouri Territory. In 1819 they applied to join the Union as a slave state. They were rejected, but the Union promised to keep Missouri's resume on file. They lied.

A bitter dispute rose before congress and soon "The Missouri Compromise" was that Missouri's application would be accepted, but they would be assigned to "french fries" and wouldn't be allowed to work the register.

The Missouri Compromise bill also paired slave state Missouri with Maine, a free state, and barred slavery north and west of Missouri.

After his presidency ended he lived in Virgina, but left when he noticed that Virgina was "for lovers." He moved to New York. He once wrote that he "liked New York, except for the squeegee guys" and the "lack of officially licensed WWE apparel at F.A.O. Schwartz.

He died in New York and was buried there. In 1858 he was dug up and re-interred to the President's Circle at Hollywood Cemetery in Richmond, Virginia.

So, the ball's in your court New York. What is your next move in this never-ending James Madison chess game?


-James Monroe's nickname "The Last Cocked Hat" referred to his tough military background. A cocked hat was a military hat

-The first person to be married in the White House was Monroe's daughter Maria.

-He once said "If America wants concessions, she must fight for them. We must purchase our power with our blood."


-When he said "If America wants concessions, she must fight for them. We must purchase our power with our blood." He was referring to movie theater concessions. He would often pay for his popcorn by opening a vein. For penny candy, however, he usually just picked off a scab.

-Was deeply in debt when he died. And he still owes a couple movies to Netflix.

-James Madison is buried in Hollywood Cemetery in Richmond, Virginia. Famed stripper Madison James is buried in Richmond Cemetery in Hollywood, California. Right between Snub Pollard and Dennis Hopper.

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