Run D.M.C.'s Raising Hell

I can't get enough of Run D.M.C. I have critiqued their lyrics a bunch of times before (it's all in the archives.)

This time, let's take a look at "Raising Hell."

"Raising Hell"

[Run-D.M.C.]
Kings from Queens from Queens come Kings
We're raisin' hell like a class when the lunch bell rings

Yes, hell has no fury like a bunch of grade schoolers en route to a cafeteria.
I like the first line because it made me think of the Kevin James show "King of Queens." Also, the title "Raising Hell" makes me think of that movie Raising Helen. It also kinda reminds me of the movie Raising Arizona which sorta reminds me of Arizona congressman Jeff Flake.
His name makes me think of Tony the Tiger. Also Tony Curtis. What a flake.

The king will be praised, and hell will be raised
S-s-s-suckers try to faze him but D won't be fazed
So what's your name? D.M.C.! The King is me!
Your High-ness, or His Majesty!
Now you can debate, c-c-c-concentrate

Welcome to the first annual bunchojunk.com debate. The topic is c-c-c-concentrate.

CON: It is unappealing to concentrate and freeze orange juice. Also, many vitamins are lost in the process.
PRO: It keeps the juice f-f-f-fresh.

The pro-c-c-c-concentrate side wins!

But you can't imitate D.M.C. the Great!

Dissin all devils, causin havoc in HELL
At a very high level base and treble shall YELL
Heard in the heavens are the sounds supreme
So clear to the ear it is sometimes seen

Wow. The sound is so clear we can almost see it. Wait a minute! If the sound was clear we would be LESS likely to see it! We would see THROUGH it. Wouldn't we?

So loud like a cloud with thunder and LIGHTNING
So proud to the crowd it is somewhat FRIGHTENING
No calm in the storm like a beast unleashed
There's no stoppin cause the rockin cannot cease; BREAK!

[Run]
You see it's harder than hard, not one bit soft
Courageous and contagious so you better break North
Not a cold, on a roll, did you hear me cough?
Just listen while I'm dissin cause you're p*ssin' me off

So, a man walks into a deli. The deli guy says "I have a cold."
The man says "on a roll?"
"No", the deli guy retorts, "on rye bread."
They laughed for hours. Then the man bought a bag of pita pockets and went home and made sweet love to them.

Cold bedding is spreading all across your face
You can't take when I break and if that's the case
I'll go on, and on, and kick the bass
So back up off the cup while I take my taste

[D.M.C.]
It's highly appraised when the hell is raised
So demanding and commanding that you all stand dazed
The unbelieving receiving prophecy so true
I cut the head off the Devil and I throw it at you

The devil sucks! First Run D.M.C. dissed him, now he cut off his head. Stupid devil. I hate him and anyone else involved in Judas Priest.

My mighty mic control, already brought his soul
The rock king is so bold when he rocks and roll
A black hat is my crown, symbolizin' the sound
Signifyin, we won't play around; BUST IT!

Is he asking us to bust his hat? I hope so because I always liked the silent film hobos who wore a busted in hat. I hope D.M.C. lets me borrow it.

[Run]
Rappin and climbin beat-makin every day
No synthesizer sound, so silence when I say
I am great, get it straight, cause that's my fate
My name is Run I'm number one, that's how I rate
He's in the place with the bass, and style and grace
His name is J he's here to play, and win this race
He's off the wall, on the ball, his name is D
Kind of tall yes y'all, he's down with me

[D.M.C.]
From the mountain valley to the deep blue sea
The word is heard as told by D

So boastful. Boasting is the tool of the devil, you know. Of course if he is decapitated I guess it's a moot point.

I don't sing I bring, much delight
Like a star shinin bright in the darkest night
If you are cold, I'll bring you heat

I'm cold! Really cold. Bring me heat! Plus, the devil says HE is cold too (but that might just be due to massive blood loss.)

Like I brought the whole world my funky beat
Mysterious and serious I ain't no joke
Fire from the depths of hell AND YOU CAN SMELL THE SMOKE!

[Run]
Kickin and tickin while you're havin a ball
Like chicken finger lickin I'll be vickin you all
So do the bird, have you heard, did they give you a call

Damn it! I didn't get a call. I never get all my messages! Plus I think my roommate is drinking my orange juice concentrate and replacing it with that lousy fresh squeeze. I'm going to stick the devil's head in the fridge so he can keep an eye on him.

Just me and D.M.C., cold shakin the walls

[D.M.C.]
There's no fearin when hearin sound of this kind
Across the land every man is goin out of his mind
On the face of the earth spreadin like disease
Contaminating infiltrating like a horde of bees

[Run-D.M.C.]
Lord of lyrics, duke of discussion
Ruler of rock, your king at cold-crushin
Puller of people - controller of crowds

RUN D.M.C.'s resume:

1985 to present: Lord of lyrics
1988 to present: duke of discussion
1990 to 1992, 1994 to present: Ruler of rock
1993 to present: Cold crushin' king, people puller and crowd control

Lingering lyrics all lasting and loud

[Run]
Left y'all, ah to the left y'all
because I rock upon the mike real def y'all

[D.M.C.]
And to the right y'all, ah to the right y'all
because I rock upon the mike all night y'all

[Run]
You see, I..

[D.M.C.]
.. want respect, if I'm correct
They're all like a ball that I have checked

And the shots they take have no effect
Some punk tried to dunk but he broke his neck
Cause I rock harder, and I get farther
You wanna battle D hey please don't bother
To waste your time, messin with my rhyme
The only kick you get out of is in the behind!

How punny! Add punmiester to that resume!