Monday, October 31, 2005

Chiller Theatre

Chiller Theatre is one of the biggest horror conventions of the year. This year it was held October 28-30, 2005.
Located by Giants Stadium, the convention takes place in a hotel FAR too small for such an event.

Before I tell you about the guest list, let me give you a broad explanation of what these events are to anyone who has never been.

Horror conventions, comic book shows, Sci-Fi conventions, toy shows, etc. are all pretty much the same.

They have most of the same guests, the same vendors and the same nerds in attendance.

The only difference is the MAIN FOCUS of the event. Still, just because someone has NOTHING to do with horror films doesn't preclude them from being a guest at Chiller.

The guest list included:

Elvira:

It's hard to decide WHAT celebrities you want to get a photo with, but Elvira was an easy choice. The 56 year old macabre host looks almost exactly the same in person as she does on TV.
The only drawback is the price.
Elvira's prices were pretty much the standard for the event. $20 for autographed photos, $20 to autograph your item. Basically you had to pony up $20 for your encounter with the Mistress of the Dark.

Adam West and Burt Ward:
TV's Batman and Robin were also on hand. Getting their autograph was gonna cost you more than Elvira, however. $40 would get you West, and Ward would be an additional $30.

Tom 'Tiny' Lister:
The muscleman who worked the WWF as Zeus for a short time and has appeared in tons of films (notably Friday) was on hand as well.
Lister charged $20 for an autograph, but if you wanted to take a picture (with YOUR camera) that was an additional $10. Plus he isn't as pretty as Elvira.
Not now, ask me in 10 years, and the answer might change.

George Romero:
The legendary horror director was THE most popular man at the event. Bar none. His PERSONAL line was over an hour long and to get in THAT line you had to have already waited in a line to get into the 'guest tent' which took anywhere from 45 minutes to 3 hours to wait in.

Abdullah the Butcher:

There was a bunch of wrestlers on hand (Mick Foley, Rob Van Dam, Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff.) Deciding to only visit ONE wrestler, I choose Abdullah. I met him once before a match in Philadelphia. I got a photo then, too. In that picture he was biting my forehead.
If you are not a wrestling fan, you may not know Abdullah. Heck, even most casual fans have not ever seen him. But they heard of him. Abdullah has been wrestling since 1958. Now, approaching 70 years old he still wrestles on occasion.
His matches are known for being the bloodiest and Abdullah is considered to be the most sadistic man in wrestling.
That said, he was the nicest guy at the convention.
On his table was a mess of photos and other merchandise. My favorite item was the autographed fork (Abdullah often uses a fork in the ring to cut open his opponent's head.)
For $25 he let me have the fork, an autographed cane and three autographed photos. Plus he let me snap one with my camera.
After the photo was taken he said "You don't want another picture?"
Of course I did.
So he grabbed my head and we took THIS photo:

Sure, I was scared. Obviously, it was painful. But it is ALMOST the greatest photo I have ever seen.
Unfortunately, if you look over my shoulder you can see Vince Russo, the idea man who helped destroy WCW. Cut him out and the photo is pure gold.

Claudia Wells:
Jennifer Parker from the first Back to the Future film was also on hand. She was really nice and possibly HOTTER than she was 20 years ago. She signed a Back to the Future 'Save the Clock Tower' flyer for me. She wrote "I love you" and her phone number JUST LIKE IN THE MOVIE. I didn't even have to ask!
Sadly, she won't take my call.

This barely scratches the surface of the guest list. Larry Hagman, Barbara Eden, Tom Savini, The A-Team's Dwight Schultz, Tonya Harding and about 30 other people of different levels of notoriety were on hand.

Of course, unless you had a couple grand to spend, you could never afford to get all their autographs.

So, you go to the vendor room.

This is a room packed with toys, bootleg DVDs, comic books and posters. I didn't buy much but I ran into Sylvester Stallone's son Sage a few times.
I didn't talk to Sage out of fear of calling him 'Stage Sallone' but I did watch him eat a Reese’s Big Cup.

THAT was worth the $20 admission fee alone.

In addition they have discussion panels and films.

I caught a couple discussion panels. One featured John Landis. The Blues Brothers director is a jerk.
During the course of his discussion a video clip was shown. The video projector (for some reason) projected the clip in black and white, not color.
Then Landis berates the 17 year-old running the projector.
He mocks the kid for the next 20 minutes.
It was pretty disappointing.
Here is my open letter to John Landis.

Dear John,
Since you work in the film industry, you should know that mistakes sometimes happen. Sometimes it’s minor like when a projector doesn't work.
Sometimes it's major like when a helicopter kills Vic Morrow.
Try to learn the difference and react accordingly.
Thanks,
Guy Hutchinson


Chiller Theatre was awesome, but it was SEVERELY overcrowded and overpriced.

In the end I can tell people that Mick Foley and Claudia Wells asked me where the lobby was, Tonya Harding waved to me and Burt Ward was in the bathroom with me.

I guess I lived the American Dream in just a couple days.

Snap into me

After being Twinkie the Kid for Halloween last year I was concerned about this years costume.

I couldn't top Twinkie the Kid, but I needed to have something at least half as good.

So I decided to be Randy "Macho Man" Savage. After spending hours sewing a sequined robe, I decided to change my costume to the OTHER mascot of spicy beef snacks.

I'm not sure if he has a name, but he HAS to be the most obnoxious mascot in TV history.

You have probably seen the commercial; he shouts "Eat me." It's not Shakespeare, but I guess it's on the same level as Randy's "Snap into 'em!"

The best part about this costume is that it came as is from the internet. I can't take any credit for making it, but I'm sure I will get some positive reviews when I walk around a Halloween party handing out dried pieces of 'mechanically separated meat parts.'

If anyone doesn't like it I will tell 'em to "eat me."

My Twinkie Costume


I love Twinkie the Kid. I like him EVEN more than I like Twinkies. In fact, if he turned his back on the cream filled sponge cake and became a spokesman for a brand of sardines, I'd still love him.

Twinkie the Kid combines our love of cowboys with our love of dessert. We should all be thankful for that.

So as a tribute I decided to put together a Twinkie the Kid costume for Halloween 2004.

A quick internet search revealed that a Twinkie costume DID exist.

Unfortunately, THIS is what it looked like. Even on Halloween I wouldn't want to look like this guy. If it wasn't for the word "Twinkies" scrawled across the costume I would have assumed he was supposed to be a thumb. A queer thumb.

Despite not being very good at crafts I bought that and turned it into this:

I bought the oversized cowboy hat at a Halloween store; the bandana was made by gluing small fabric hearts to a larger piece of fabric.

The gloves were a neat touch, I found them at Disneyland. I know, Twinkie the Kid didn't wear gloves like that, but they looked good with the costume.

To top off the costume I painted my face yellow and carried a lasso.

Then I realized I was too old to go 'trick or treating' so I stayed home and watched The Weather Channel.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Movieland Wax: Robert Stack


Here's Robert Stack. His statue is posed holding a gun in character as Eliot Ness from 'The Untouchables.'

Above him are some photos of what I am assuming are FBI buildings. Next to him are books. Possibly books of law. He also has a coffee pot because lawmen love their java.

Mmmmm java.

They should have stacked up the books and put a sign on them reading "Robert's stack." That would have made me laugh.

Movieland Wax: Hulk Hogan


His name is synonymous with Pro Wrestling. He is Hulk Hogan.

Actually, that isn't true. His name isn't SYNONOMOUS with Pro Wrestling. Handsome Harley Race doesn't fill out job applications listing "Hulk Hogan" as his previous career. You wouldn't say "Roller Derby is similar to Hulk Hogan." You wouldn't call Hulk Hogan fake.

No wait, I would say that.

Well, the Hulkster was EVEN MORE fake at Movieland Wax.

The statue was posed in a small ring in front of a giant WWF logo. He was located near Superman, Sylvester Stallone and Mr. T.

Hogan was one of the celebrities that visited 'himself' at the museum. In addition, he placed his hands in cement outside in Movieland's forecourt.

Movieland Wax Museum

The Movieland Wax Museum was a fixture in fabulous Buena Park California (just outside of Disneyland) for 43 years. On Halloween Day, 2005 they closed their doors forever.

Click on any photo below to read a short article about it.