Thursday, July 27, 2006

Lance takes it in the... uh... Bass

By now you probably know that Lance Bass is gay.
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I bet you suspected it before anyway. What the hell kind of name is Lance for a straight guy? Or Bass for that matter?

I am just going to wait for Lance Armstrong and Outlaw Ron Bass to come out of the closet and prove my point.

While we are waiting, lets take a look at the Disneyland obsessed micechat.com message boards and what THEY had to say about the subject.

The ball starts rolling when Johnny Depp informs Mice Chatters of the news
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The news is accompanied by a photo of Lance wearing a shirt adorned with roses and standing in front of a wall emblazoned with the word "lollipop" about a thousand times.

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Olympicnut responds with something, but I completely missed it paying much more attention to his avatar.

As I stare, wishing that I could only have as much fun as his avatar is having a flaming skull jumps into the fray.

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The skull is shocked, but the smiley face posted below the text is winking. What does this all mean? Is the smiley NOT shocked? Is the skull just far more gullible than the smiley? Is the skull ACTUALLY the smiley in it's formerly fleshy state? Am I reading waaaaayyyyy too much into this?

As I attempted to ponder this question ANOTHER skull jumps aboard.

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You know, for a website devoted to the "Happiest Place on Earth," their avatars seem a bit too preoccupied with death and decomposing. Where is Olympicnut? His avatar was so happy!

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Dammit! They even managed to make him unhappy.

Just when the angry avatars starting to take over BAM in comes a monkey.

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I love monkeys.

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The next poster comments that we need "more famous people to come out." His avatar seems to show and an out and proud Mickey Mouse posing in front of a rainbow.

Or maybe the rainbow doesn't make him gay.

Maybe he's a leprechaun.

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This post conveys the statement that Hollywood is "vile."

I take deep personal offense to that.

I hope someone cheers me up.

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A DUDE WITH A GIANT MUSTACHE! Wow! That sure brightens my day!

Mission accomplished.


Ahhhh. Maybe I should put in a call to Lance Armstrong.

8 comments:

  1. Anyone know Outlaw Ron Bass' number?

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  2. Anonymous7/27/2006

    1-888-GAY-NESS

    ReplyDelete
  3. The magazine cover said he was hurt by rumors. What rumors? Rumors that he's gay? He is gay. Or maybe he was hurt by rumors that Mickey Mouse is gay. That would explain how Donald manages to get top billing now. It all makes sense.

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  4. As an openly gay man I must say that the title of this post is the funniest thing I have ever read.

    Cheers, Sweetie!

    ReplyDelete
  5. As an openly straight guy with a gay guy for an avatar I wish to state that I too found the title hysterical.

    ReplyDelete